Key with wings

 Why do i care what everyone thinks?

Why are all my thoughts just linked with the fact that im liked or im hated

Why cant i decide whether im doing ok

Why cant i decide for a change

Why my heart continues to bleed

On the words of others who are not what they seem

Why cant i say what i mean

Why am i basing my value off others as if we’re a team

Even if i go solo you know its not what i mean

I often forget there’s a shoulder i can lean

But when i remember often i find that shoulder to lean has all been a lie

So when i feel myself start to tilt i fall where i leaned cause 

All they thought about was their self and just ignoring that i asked them for help

Welp here i go all over again thinking this cycle was going to end

Thinking my soul was starting to mend as if this was a bend

My bodys a garden that i need to tend, to water and feed as if it was a friend

That i had all intentions to help grow and survive but i cant attend

Cause it is my body and i hate it so and i know why i hate it 

But i dont understand why no body knows

That this was not what i chose, Cause no this is not the final show

And i hate that my mind keeps trying to close as if its a gift wrapped in a bow

Since this is all how it goes but wait This life has more pros and yes often times hits in the lows

Honestly thats kinda on the nose but hey thats woes, but need to keep and dont doze

Other wise you’ll be froze in ice of depression unable to move just wanting to sleep and do nothing cause lifes worth nothing and your ready to throw the keys.

But please its not time for your body to decompose. Your life is not a fucking joke

Dont make the threat dont take the leap and fall through the air as if you plan to land on your feat.

Cause honestly i need to stop caring what others think. 

Otherwise i’ll keep hurting and unable to heal. Cause the line between reality and dreams is blurring so badly i keep diving in to pretend to not care cause its just how i cope

To pretend the issues not there as if life was a joke

I need to stop listening and work to make their insults not stain Cause everytime i listen or looke i remember and feel the pain. I need to get moving thats how i survive cause if i stop for to long depression will eat me alive. Anxiety is trying to slow me down to help out depression as if it was a night on the town. 

I hate the fact im stuck with a frown unable to remember the good memories as if they’ve been drowned. God i feel like a clown that’s wearing a crown- Wait stop i need to calm down

Their words do not mean a thing and dont let their meanings ring

This is life is connected with string and you are its current king. 

Dont let them take your ability to sing and stop letting them take your happiness from what life brings. 

Oh and dont forget just cause they might be there  doesnt mean they hold the key so please go spread your wings


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