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 In my head, Here i go again. Why can`t you see, What i see. Everythings going downhill, I feel ill. Why Do these Words echo what was said long ago. I don`t know any more. IS my Dream reachable. Is it even my Dream. Is it something i wanna do. Why don`t I know. Why did i think, I wouldn`t live long. Kept being pushed around. Why doesn`t she see, how bad she hurts me. Thoose small coments still on my skin. Even though i forgave why can`t i forget. Am i broken beyond repair. Things i loved to do, i slowly start to hate, no clue why. So i guess i`ll keep marching on. Even though it feels like i`m loosing. It feels like i`ve given up. It feels like i`m a rock fighting to float but slowly drowning in this world. So what do i do? I don`t have a clue. Use to loose myself to ignore the pain,to fight depression. I guess i`m not winning today. Keep tryingto fight but its not working. I can`t understand my own emotions.I feel so broke, which way do i go? My past was so bright, then went out like a light of a flickering candle on a rainy night. Her words stung and sitck to my skin and can be seen in ink. What do i do. Don`t have a clue. Don`t show them, they`ll hate you. Thats what my mind says, everytime, i try to voice my pain. So i go and hide. I never speak the truth, afraid to hurt others like she hurt me. Why did she hurt me. Her words they stung like a bee sting, but never went away. Then my angel, whose shoulder i cried on more than once. Who understood me well, had to fly away. Now she watches from above. Mom i miss you, If i had cleaned up the house so much quicker maybe you would be still here. Mentioned multiple times. After the house was clean you`d go right then. Now your not here, It feels like my fault. Now she the pupeteer starts to draw near. Her bullying put me down. Threw me to the ground. She always saw that i was sad and asked me who was bullying. How could i tell her that she was the bully. Slowly all this pain turns to hate. She uses trickery to try to be center stage. She just wants someone to boss around. All she wants is a pupet. Her words stung like ice. I`m tired of her and all her pain. Her house reminds me of all thoose tears. All thoose fights and arguements over stupid things.Nana why did you do all thoose things. Why were you mean with your words. You played nice, in company. But you forget all thoose hateful things. I have heard and quote you for. You forget i know your true thoughts. You hated religions other than your own. You were racist. Now i`m done. With all your lies . 


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